I was brought up to be nice. Being nice meant saying yes and going along with what others wanted. Being nice meant when my best friend said at 10 years old "You are not wearing that coat and copying me" I changed it and tried to find something very different. I continued to confuse being NICE with being loving for many years later. I always wanted to share with others. I would go to work and share all I had learnt with others because deep inside I believed that we were all ONE and if I shared then we'd all benefit. Others never agreed with this and with held everything they had learned and I would feel disheartened but still compelled to continue sharing. When my first boyfriend would complain about each thing I would do I would try even harder next time, yet, I never seemed to hit what he wanted. At work I would try to share and communicate and would be found writing a list and explaining all about my job so the person covering for me would find it easier. However, they never returned this favour. This being so nice also meant at any one time I would have lots on the go and inevitably I would end up letting someone down and they'd be so damn annoyed and I'd be left thinking - what happened I am doing so so much to help others can't they see this?
The biggest disappointment came when I was studying and on placements. I would try so hard to understand what was required and would put 110% into what I was doing but somehow it wasn't what they wanted. I was such a 'NICE' person so why was I in such a horrible space? I was frequently shouted at and told to stop making a big deal out of things. So when I couldn't do what others wanted they'd shout, when they were doing something I didn't like and I spoke up they'd say stop making a big deal out of it. To say the least I was totally confused. How on earth will I ever get the outer to reflect the nice, sharing, caring world I wanted to live in. Where were all the nice people?
Even my Reiki Master seemed to be very impatient and short with me. I began to wondered if there was something seriously wrong with me if the reflection in the mirror was so horrid? And then I'd see such quotes and comments that you create your reality by what you are and what you do and think and feel - NOW these just drove the feeling of something being seriously wrong with me deep and more painful. Being nice and loving just didn't seem to be the answer. So what was?
Self respect - I learnt that the person I needed to be nice to was me. You see the way it is, is that what is out there is reflected outwards and so it doesn't matter so much what I do out there nearly as much as in matter what I do in here first! You see cleaning the mirror doesn't improve the mirror half as much as nurturing what is being looked at through the mirror. How I treat me is what is reflected out there. So being nice isn't bad its just an inside job first!
www.expansionistheway.weebly.com
https://www.facebook.com/expansionisthewaybusiness
Twitter: @youcanhandleit
[email protected]
You tube: Joanne Lovett
Joanne Lovett
Life Coach and Holistic Healer at Expansion is the Way!
The biggest disappointment came when I was studying and on placements. I would try so hard to understand what was required and would put 110% into what I was doing but somehow it wasn't what they wanted. I was such a 'NICE' person so why was I in such a horrible space? I was frequently shouted at and told to stop making a big deal out of things. So when I couldn't do what others wanted they'd shout, when they were doing something I didn't like and I spoke up they'd say stop making a big deal out of it. To say the least I was totally confused. How on earth will I ever get the outer to reflect the nice, sharing, caring world I wanted to live in. Where were all the nice people?
Even my Reiki Master seemed to be very impatient and short with me. I began to wondered if there was something seriously wrong with me if the reflection in the mirror was so horrid? And then I'd see such quotes and comments that you create your reality by what you are and what you do and think and feel - NOW these just drove the feeling of something being seriously wrong with me deep and more painful. Being nice and loving just didn't seem to be the answer. So what was?
Self respect - I learnt that the person I needed to be nice to was me. You see the way it is, is that what is out there is reflected outwards and so it doesn't matter so much what I do out there nearly as much as in matter what I do in here first! You see cleaning the mirror doesn't improve the mirror half as much as nurturing what is being looked at through the mirror. How I treat me is what is reflected out there. So being nice isn't bad its just an inside job first!
www.expansionistheway.weebly.com
https://www.facebook.com/expansionisthewaybusiness
Twitter: @youcanhandleit
[email protected]
You tube: Joanne Lovett
Joanne Lovett
Life Coach and Holistic Healer at Expansion is the Way!
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